The kids on pasture on an easy November afternoon.
As if it wasn’t bad enough…
My husband asked me once if I thought this place was cursed. I laughed and said of course not. Perhaps just the part of his family that has cursed themselves with their own misery. But no, not the land. Never the land.
I still believe that. However…
Last week the news arrived. The test results from the lab, the completed compilation of facts from near and far, observations from our vet in the valley, necropsy reports from Ft Collins, DNA testing from UC Davis, expert assumptions from across the west. We are seeking answers as to the cause for four foals dead in two years. Something is very wrong. I need answers. This is a big part of my life, my job, my passion, my love. I have three foals due next year.
The vet sums it up for us. It is the ranch, he tells us.
We were hoping he would not say that. Telling me it was my stud would be easier, of course. He could be gelded and still have a wonderful life. He is a great horse now, a solid riding horse, an easy going herd mate. Giving up that part of his anatomy and his world would not be the end of a good life for him (easily spoken by a woman).
But no, it is the ranch, says the vet. Between the bacterium in the soil which has a potentially deadly affect on the sterile guts of the new born foals; to the elevation which we found can cause Big Brisket in the foals similar to that in calves; to the harsh climate which makes it all that much more… challenging… for the foals.
There is little research done on foaling and foals in elevation. Answers were not easy to find. Still they are assumptions. Educated guesses. That is enough to go on. There is nothing else. Our vet has searched for solutions, perhaps like looking for a needle in a haystack, as I have prodded him on and on and on for the resolve that we so desperately have been seeking. He responded. It is not easy to handle. The truth often is not. We will find a way. I will in turn hope my experiences will teach others. I seek to find the good. I have to look very deep. It is no where to be found on the surface.
The vet concludes his research and report with this news: the mares will need to foal elsewhere, and the foals must remain in a lower elevation until three months of age.
Yes, life goes on. But where and how we do not know. Why is all we know. Because we live, we love, we grow, we survive, we thrive, we seek, we yearn, we care, we try. Today we can only guess what tomorrow will bring. But today there is so much we can do to make tomorrow… better… somehow.
Yet fighting to be elsewhere now… My dream does not end with this mountain, I have lived on many a beautiful mountains. You’ll see! I don’t give up that easy.